Writer-director David Schmoeller had an obsession with mannequins, showcased in this 30-minute University of Texas thesis film. That obsession would reach its apotheosis in Schmoeller’s Charles Band shepherded 1979 debut feature TOURIST TRAP (on the DVD of which this short was supposed to be included, but Band was apparently too cheap to spring for a digital transfer, leaving Schmoeller to upload the film to the now defunct davidschmoeller.com).
THE SPIDER WILL KILL YOU, which involved future director Ted Nicolaou (TERRORVISION) as cinematographer, was well received, being a Jury finalist at the 1975 Student Academy Awards. It lost to Robert Zemeckis’ A FIELD OF HONOR, but did nab Schmoeller an agent, and impressed Band enough that he was willing to bankroll TOURIST TRAP.
Inspired, Schmoeller claims, by “this line of mannequins I discovered at J.C. Penney’s,” THE SPIDER WILL KILL YOU stars Robert Palter as Johnathan, a blind man residing in a theater attic. He’s first glimpsed talking to mannequins that serve as his imaginary family. One of the mannequins, found in an adjoining room, comes to life in the form of a beautiful woman Johnathan names Christina (Shirley Anderson). Johnathan shows her around his bedroom, which includes an unopened trunk he’s been told is filled with deadly spiders.
Eventually Christina strips down and offers herself to Johnathan, which makes the other female mannequins jealous. Not that Christina shows much affection, taunting her mate and none-too-tenderly informing him that “you’re a freak, Johnathan, an ugly freak.” Eventually the latter is moved to face his fears by opening the dreaded trunk.
This film isn’t an easy watch. It has a suffocatingly brooding and claustrophobic aura, with every shot bathed in varying shades of darkness and scenery that’s cluttered and uninviting.
Yet Schmoeller pulls off some superbly surreal imagery that nearly matches that of the film’s stated inspirations Alejandro Jodorowsky and Luis Bunuel (such as the sight of the living mannequin Christina nonchalantly breaking off one of her arms). The atmospheric depiction of the dead-eyed mannequins, visualized more often than not in close-ups viewed from outré angles, is powerfully creepy and surreal (an effect repeated in TOURIST TRAP). Furthermore, the film belies the number one drawback of student shorts by featuring acting that’s reasonably strong, with Robert Palter delivering a lead performance at once menacing and sympathetic.
Vital Statistics
THE SPIDER WILL KILL YOU
Director: David Schmoeller
Producer: Ana Landry
Screenplay: David Schmoeller
Cinematography: Ted Nicolaou
Cast: Robert Palter, Shirley Anderson, Donald Weismann, Elizabeth Bove, Lee Roberts, Lenny Laird, Joanne Johnson, Mary Anne Harmon, Gordon Thomas