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Necromania

This “Tale of Weird Love” was one of the final films directed by Edward D. Wood, Jr.  Filmed in three days on a reported $5,000 budget, NECROMANIA (1971) was, like the other late period Wood films THE ONLY HOUSE IN TOWN and THE YOUNG MARRIEDS, made for the 1970s porno film market (a year prior to the XXX breakout DEEP THROAT).  It was considered lost until recently, with a soft-core version, found in 1992, being the film’s supposed “only” extant form; the full version was located in 2001 by Wood biographer Rudolph Grey, an event that in the cult movie sphere was nearly equivalent to the discovery of the Dead Sea Scrolls.

The film is far from Wood’s best work, but did evidently mean something to him.  I base that on the fact that he told its story three times: in the 1971 tale “Come Inn” (published in YOUNG BEAVERS magazine and the 2014 collection BLOOD SPLATTERS QUICKLY) and THE ONLY HOUSE, a 1972 novelization of the present film.  One (or both) of those texts need to be read for a full understanding of NECROMANIA.

Necromania

Set to outrageously incongruous lounge music, the unmarried couple Danny (Ric Lutze) and Shirley (Rene Bond) turn up at a Hollywood Hills mansion to meet Madame Heles (Maria Arnold), a witch residing in a coffin (which was reportedly owned by former Wood cast member Criswell) contained in a red room decked out with skulls and an inverted cross.  The purpose of the visit is sexual therapy (which isn’t made entirely clear).  Danny and Shirley meet Hele’s assistant Tanya (Tanya), who informs them that the madame won’t be accepting visitors until midnight (and it’s only 2:30), so she shows the couple to a bedroom and offers them a dildo that serves as an intercom.  Danny suffers from erectile dysfunction (which, again, isn’t made too clear), yet he and Shirely succeed in having sex while someone watches them from an adjoining room though eyeholes in an owl painting.

Necromania

From there the film loses any semblance of a narrative, with Shirley venturing outside the bedroom and meeting Barb, a young lesbian with whom she has multiple trysts (later claiming that “something came over me”), and Danny getting it on with Tanya.  But then the Madame, speaking from inside her coffin, proclaims that “It is time!”  Tanya and Barb usher Danny and Shirley into the red room, where T&B do the nasty and D&S watch.  Regarding Shirley, Heles pronounces herself satisfied—as “Henceforth she will live for sex, and sex alone!”—while Carl apparently requires more attention, meaning he gets shut in the coffin with Heles.

This is said to be the best of Ed Wood’s porno features. It’s certainly the most characteristic, with a great deal of horror movie iconography that includes skulls, coffins and a mention of Wood’s favorite actor in the early line “Any minute I expect Bela Lugosi as Dracula.”  There are also portents of necrophilia (a longtime Wood obsession) and some (but not nearly enough) period-specific psychedelia.

Regarding the acting, by a retinue that included the 1970s XXX movie legends Maria Arnold, Rene Bond and Ric Lutze, it’s as outrageously inept as you’d expect given that (as the opening credits claim) “Our Cast Wish to Remain Anonymous.”  The sexual content, featuring very hairy performers, is among the most lethargic you’ll see, and the narrative all-but completely incoherent (again: you’ll have to peruse the story and book to figure out what’s going on), leaving us with a singularly dull concoction that even by Ed Wood standards is hopelessly inept.

 

Vital Statistics

NECROMANIA: A TALE OF WEIRD LOVE
Cinema Classics

Director/Producer/Screenplay/Editing: “Don Miller” (Edward D. Wood, Jr.)
Cinematography: Ted Gorley, Hal Guthu
Cast: Maria Arnold, Rene Bond, Ric Lutze, Tanya, Edward D. Wood, Jr.